'Just let 'em die'...really?

Universal healthcare. Obamacare. Tea Party. Ron Paul. Rick Perry. Ugh.

As the mom of a 6 week old and 2 year old, I'll keep this short. Healthcare is a complicated issue. As a citizen of the richest country in the world, I don't think anyone should die because they can't afford expensive treatment that will save their life or greatly increase their quality of life. However, I also don't think American citizens can be required to purchase a product by the federal government.

Understanding these basics about me, here is my response to Ron Paul's ridiculous "Let them die" moment during the last GOP debate when asked what should happen to a healthy 30 year old man who doesn't purchase health insurance but finds himself in a coma:

Make them pay after you save their life. We garnish people's wages for child support, etc., why couldn't we do something like that after the state fronts the bill to save a person's life? If someone requires treatment and they don't have insurance, take 10% (or whatever) out of their pay check until the bills have been paid. Having your wages garnished would totally suck, but there's the accountability...and you get to live.

People should not be required to purchase health insurance. However if they make the choice not to buy insurance and find themselves in a serious/life/death situation, they should absolutely be treated. What would happen if someone got into a car accident and they come into the ER bleeding all over the place in need of a blood transfusion, but they don't have insurance? Just let them die on the table? Who will pay for the clean up? Not that guy because he doesn't have insurance and now you let him die.

While Ron Paul is correct in that there needs to be accountability for those who don't do their part and buy insurance, the price should not be their life. But we are a compassionate people, and there is room for compassion and accountability. That's my plan, do you have any ideas?

LDS Putting Off Marriage

Many of us may have heard (or heard about) Thomas S. Monson's, president and prophet of the LDS Church, address to the men of the church encouraging them stop putting off marriage. Apparently, there is a trend in the church of young, eligible LDS men who are intentionally not getting married as young as they used to. I was amused that the Sacramento Bee, a Gentile newspaper, saw this as news. The answers to the question "Why?" seem to be obvious: school, career, enjoying bachelorhood, not enough money and/or not enough time.

When I first heard about and read President Monson's address telling young men to stop waiting to get married, I was a little put-off for those young men. What's wrong with wanting to be financially prepared for marriage? What's wrong with waiting until you're done with school? What's wrong with waiting until you're "ready"? (Ok that last one is a trick question; my favorite answer to "How do you know if you're ready to get married?" is "When you're ready to accept the challenges." Otherwise, I don't think anyone is ever "ready").

However, as I read the article and reflected on my own experience, I do think a lot can be lost as an individual and married couple by intentionally putting off marriage until one is older and "ready." I love what Professor Holman in the Sacramento Bee article says: ""When you scrimp and sacrifice together when you're young, that brings you closer."

Holman puts so succinctly how I've felt about getting married at the ripe old age of 20. I NEVER thought I would be one of those LDS girls to get married young, but that's how it worked out for me. I have often thought about how certain things would have been easier if I had waited to get married. However, when I reflect all the growing I've done with my husband, I know that I am stronger and we are stronger because of all the things we've gone through together. In explaining this to other people, I tried to give them the visual of two tree roots growing together to make one, stronger root. Cheesy, I know.

And, indeed getting married young and sacrificing together, really may play a part in why LDS marriages last longer and LDS have fewer divorces. Not that getting married is the answer to lowering the divorce rate; there are a lot of contributing factors, including how LDS look at marriage and their general level of commitment (the #1 determiner of whether a relationship works out).

I know what many are going to say about why people should not get married young, especially women. Here's an example of the things I've heard: "You need to figure out who you are." "Don't you want to have time just to have fun?" "I don't want to get married until I have enough money." "Don't get married until I'm done traveling and doing everything I want to do." I've heard the same things when it came to having children, too.

I never knew exactly how to respond to questions like these because I do think it's important for young people to have the readiness needed to enter into a marriage responsibly, but that's different for each person and doesn't depend on age. I discovered a great response to these questions in an article titled "Defending the Family in Troubled World" by Elder Porter (a church general authority). He highlights teachings of Christ and the prophets and framed them in a way that is relevant to this issue, which really boils down to why family, including getting married, is the most important thing any person can participate in and be a part of. In 2 Timothy 3:2 it says,"“For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy …" (not a good thing).

Elder Porter stated that what we constantly hear in our world now is: “You’re number one,” “Do your own thing,” “You’re special,” “Find yourself.” He continued on, "Such messages are so pervasive that we unconsciously absorb them and sometimes repeat them. Yet they are diametrically opposite from the message of the Savior, as recorded in similar language in every one of the four gospels: “He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it” (Matthew 10:39).

I had never thought about how taking time, energy, and other resources from my family (or future family) in the context of this verse could be me losing my life while trying to 'gain a life.' I had never thought about how all the boys I could've dated, the traveling I didn't do, the career(s) I gave up to get married and have children was losing my life in a way that is pleasing to Christ...and exactly what we're supposed to do. Losing our lives in the service a righteous spouse and raising children up to God is not something to be ashamed of...even if it means getting married younger than everyone else. LDS missionaries lose their life in this way for 2 years, too. It's something to be proud of.

Intentionally putting of marriage to partake in activities like education, careers, living the the good life, etc. is really putting off the blessings of the opportunity to grow even closer, stronger earlier with a spouse. You cannot calculate the growth, love, patience, and other Christ-like qualities that come from sacrificing, struggling, learning and growing together.At the same time, men and women are also encouraged to get as much education as possible. 

The bottom line is, don't wait for things to be 'perfect.'